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Oh, I thought you were. Oops.

Brian laughs at the thought of some measly kids trying to take his polar bear. He also laughs at the thought of those measly kids being his agent.

Pablo says hi.

Mick smacks Brian's beard so hard, it flies off, then magically grows back.

Reg says hi, then smacks Mick.

Player Update

So they were in New York. How did they get there? They hijacked the teams bus with Mark's wonderful bionic arm.

Oda: Wow. So this is the biggest city in America?

Mark: Well, not necessarily. Just the most popular.

Brian: I really hate this place.

Kura: Dude, I'm afraid to ask why.

Brian: Well, it all started before I was in the major leagues. Back in high school. When my beard was just an acne 'stache. We came to see the President give some speech about something. My friend and I were really bored, so he got out his paintball gun. I was like "Bro, you can't shoot the President with a paintball gun." Well, it turns out that you can, it just isn't legal. So now I'm kind of wanted in New York as an accomplice, but no one can recognize me because of my beard.

Nomoto: Wait, that means we could be at risk of getting in trouble. I'm sure Jack wouldn't want that.

John: I'm John which Jack can be a nickname of. I can tell you personally that Jack does not give a damn.

Nomoto: No. I mean our GM.

Kura: We know exactly what you mean and don't care. Look around!

Nomoto looked around at the big city for the first time. He was pretty awe inspired.

Nomoto: We'll take a quick look around, but we need to leave for Kyoto today.

They decided to split up and go where they pleased.

Kurihara, Brian, Pablo, Oda, Kura and Kennedy went to time square.

Pablo: I remember this place. I was kidnapped here once.

Kurihara: You were kidnapped?! By who?!

Pablo: Oh, it was just Albert Pujols and Chris Carpenter.

Oda: Aren't they, like, huge MLB stars?

Pablo: Yeah, turns out they're kind of evil and just happen to be well loved by the general public. But, hey, what's wrong with a friendly rivalry?

Kura: Man, I wish stuff like that happened in the NPB.

Kennedy: Anyway, where should we go?

Kurihara: I think that place says "sports" let's go there.

They decided to go to the ESPN Sports Zone.

Kennedy: I need to catch up on the scores today, let's go upstairs to watch a little TV.

On the big screen was a picture of Brian and the announcer saying he could have been a part of an attempted assassination on the president years ago. There was a picture taken of him very recently. Brian sticks out like a sore thumb and everyone turned around to look at him.

MEANWHILE ATOP THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING

Paul: Dude, there is no way you can tell me Godzilla is better than King Kong. Especially when we're at the Empire State Building.

Kanazawa: Yes, there is and I just did.

Mark: You're just biased because you're from Japan.

Kanazawa: No, Godzilla has had more movies.

Paul: Which also means he has had more sucky movies. The 1933 Kong movie revolutionized film making and the 2005 version did it again.

Jorkins: Enemy approaching.

Mark: Shut up, Jorkins. What Paul said. Ask anyone, Kong is THE movie monster.

Jorkins: Sir, enemy approaching.

Mark: Jorkins, there is no one approachign us!!

?: Yes, there is.

Jorkins: I informed you thusly.

Mark: Shut up, Jorkins.

? I'm Private Investigator Ryan Madison. I understand you are team mates of Brian Wilson.

Kanazawa: Hey, man, don't look at me. I'm not on their team.

Mark: Uh, yeah, we are. Anything wrong with that?

Madison: Yes, actually. I'm going to need to know his whereabouts.

Paul: We don't, but Jorkins does. Jorkins, locate Brian!

Mark: Paul, NO!

Jorkins: Brian, located.

Ryan Madison: You guys should come with me.

MEANWHILE BACK IN TIME SQUARE

Brian: We'll never get found in this crowd!

Kura: Yeah we will! You're beard is a dead giveaway!

Oda: I say we leave him here.

Chris, Kura, Pablo: I agree!

Kurihara: WAIT! We can't leave him. Seriously I'm not even on his team and I know that.

Chris: Well, genius, what do you suggest?

Kurihara: Simple, we shave his beard.

DUN DUN DUN

Pablo: Where did that come from?

It took awhile for Kurihara's words to sink in. After they did, Chris, Pablo and Brian screamed.

Kurihara: It has to be done.

Chris and Pablo: Okay.

They had to hold Brian down, restrain him, tell him he could keep the shavings in a bag and sedate him before they could shave it.

While each of them took turns shaving they heard horrible screaming noises like someone dying.

Kura: Who could be making that sound? Brian's asleep.

Chris: It must be all the villages being destroyed in the beard.

The three Knights looked at him strangely, Pablo just yawned as he knew it to be true.

MEANWHILE BACK IN SCRANTON

Jack: So I guess we will play again next-

Pepper: WAIT!!! I sense idiots!

TO BE CONTINUED...

You know what parts of this update I liked? This part.



That's right. All of it. Awesome update!

That was unnecessary...

Nonetheless, I agree with Anthony.

You could've just said I liked all of it, and so did I

I know, I just felt like doing that.

Brian - beard = AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He went from looking like Jesus to looking like a random guy on the street.

R.I.P. THE BEARD.

It'll grow back! I hope...

The one on the left looks like Troy Patton.

Please write the next update, Paul! This is my favorite!

You have to give people time to think of greatness anthony

I know, it just took him a REALLY long time with the last one. If it takes him a week, that's fine.

Yeah, sorry about that. Busy weeks and not much time on the computer. Might get the next one up in the next week or so.